Tuesday, October 28, 2008

The Big Cop Out

Blechta here and more brain dead than normal (for me), so I'm going to fall back on a really cheap way out for this week's blog entry: a writer's joke. It's my favorite.

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This writer dies and winds up at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter is very busy that day and in glancing over the writer's sheet on his "Incoming" clipboard, notices that the man wasn't particularly bad nor particularly good in his time on earth,

He turns and says, "I've decided to let you pick whether you want to go to heaven for writers, or hell for writers."

The writer figures this is a good deal, so agrees at once. "What do I do?"

St. Peter says, "Well to get down to hell, take that elevator over there. They'll show you where to go when you get there."

The writer does what St. Peter says, asks how to get to where the writers go and is told that it's the 400th door on the left.

The writer goes to the 400th door on the left and opens it.

Inside he sees endless lines of benches to which are chained countless writers. They're all pounding away furiously on keyboards as the heat of a thousand suns burns down on them and demons whip their flesh.

The writer immediately slams the door, thinking to himself, I certainly don't want to do that for all eternity!

So he returns to the elevator, takes it back up to the Pearly Gates where he asks directions to heaven for writers.

"It's the 400th door down on the right," says one of the angels.

The writer trudges down there and opens the door.

Inside he sees endless lines of benches to which are chained thousands of writers. They're all pounding away furiously on keyboards as the heat of a thousand suns burns down on them and demons whip their flesh.

The writer is exceptionally puzzled, shuts the door again and goes back to the Pearly Gates.

St. Peter asks, "So did you decide where you want to spend eternity?"

"To be perfectly honest," the writer tells him, "I don't get it. Heaven and hell for writers is exactly the same."

The good saint smiles down on the man. "Oh no, it's not the same at all. Up here you get published."

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