Friday, September 17, 2010

Light Relief

Ok, still writing the book. Week five and counting. Not a lot of time to wrack what’s left of my brain for this week’s blog. So here’s a selection of “light bulb” writers jokes that should amuse those in the know...

Q How many writers does it take to change a light bulb?
A Why does it have to be changed, it makes perfect sense the way it is.

Q How many publishers does it take to change a light bulb?
A Two. One to change the bulb and one to issue a rejection slip to the old bulb.

Q How many editors does it take to change a light bulb?
A  Hold on - shouldn't they get the author’s approval first?

Q How many artwork designers does it take to change a light bulb?
A Does it have to be a light bulb?

Q How many copy editors does it take to change a light bulb?
A The last time this question was asked, it involved artwork designers. Is the difference intentional? Should one or the other instance be changed? It seems inconsistent..

Q Okay let's try again… put it this way, how many copy editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A I can’t tell whether you mean ‘change a light bulb’ or ‘have sex in a light bulb’. Can we reword it to remove the ambiguity?

Q How many proofreaders does it take to change a light bulb?
A Proofreaders aren’t supposed to change light bulbs, just highlight the error.

Q How many indexers does it take to change a light bulb?
A See indexers

Q How many printers does it take to change a light bulb?
A Three. One to wash the old bulb, one to check the colour match and one to call the client and explain the delay.

Q How many cataloguers does it take to change a light bulb?
A Only one, but first they have to wait to see how the Library of Congress has done it.

Q How many literary critics does it take to change a light bulb?
A Literary critics don’t know how to change light bulbs, but rest assured they’ll find something wrong with the way it's done.


5 comments:

John said...

"Q Okay let's try again… put it this way, how many copy editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A I can’t tell whether you mean ‘change a light bulb’ or ‘have sex in a light bulb’. Can we reword it to remove the ambiguity. Also, most light bulbs in the U.K. have Bayonet fittings and so our readers will not know what screwing in a light bulb means?

Rick Blechta said...

Most excellent!

John Corrigan said...

Wonderful! Thank you.

Donis Casey said...

I will be stealing this list.

Hannah Dennison said...

Light relief? Yep! Love it!