Saturday, December 17, 2011

Life in the Gaps

I read Charlotte’s post, below, with nostalgia. We have lived far from our relatives for many years, so it has been many years since I have enjoyed a full-on family Christmas. Usually it’s just me and my husband Don, but our little two person Christmases turned into a rather sweet tradition. This year it looks like we won’t be having any Christmas to speak of. We have other things on our minds.

Ever since my dear husband underwent a health crisis in 2009 it's been one thing after another. Another batch of problems arose a couple of months ago, and now we live between doctor’s appointments. This current crisis has taken over both our lives at the moment, and I expect at least another couple of months of upset and discombobulation ahead. Our actual lives occur in the gaps.

In the gaps, I've managed at last to finish the first draft of the new book and send it to my editor for her critique. The book took me nearly two years to write, what with all this stuff going on. But the actual writing of it was quite therapeutic and peaceful. I read what other authors are doing with their careers and am overcome with bitter envy because I seem to be sidetracked. But life has it's tides, I suppose.
I have always hesitated to go into much public detail about my personal life. Who would be interested, other than blood relatives, I wonder? Everyone in the world has problems of their own. But then I'm always interested in and sympathetic to other people's woes, and learn something from them, as well. Would it be useful to others if I were to to add my own narrative?

In The Book of Awakening, author Mark Nepo described his experience as part of a psychodrama group, in which the participants acted out “dreams or current conflicts of unresolved pieces” of their pasts. At first he was hesitant, if not skeptical about the process, but several weeks into the group he “began to see that each person’s story, no matter how different from my own, would suddenly be about a part of me that I’d never given voice to.” Listening to others’ stories was for him about “finding comfort and healing in the surprise that our stories are really all the same.”

I find strength in the stories of others. I am grateful to those who endure difficult times, and yet have the grace and courage to share their journey with me. It helps to know that I am not alone, that our stories are really all the same.

So while I expect that I shall have to miss a few upcoming entries here at Type M 4 Murder, I have decided to pluck up my courage and lay myself bare, Dear Readers, and share this journey with you on my own blog site,

Another author I admire, Steven Pressfield, said that if you want to be an artist, you have to “give us what you’ve got.” Right now this is what I’ve got.

1 comment:

Rick Blechta said...

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