The posts on coping with distraction by my fellow Type M'ers really hit home. I've been wrestling (or at least toying) with the idea that I'm indulging in a subtle form of self-sabotage by becoming involved with too many meetings and too many organizations. And I've done this to myself.
When I become a member of any organization I really feel obligated to provide some sort of active service. This inclination comes from living in small towns most of my life. Stuff doesn't get done in these tiny communities without everyone pitching in.
But it's time for me to do some serious sorting.
Last week I completed my last meeting as a board member and treasurer of my Homeowners Association. It felt good to know that in another month I would handing the binders and responsibilities to someone else. I'm on another financial committee that is very time consuming and I plan to resign from it at the end of the year.
No more money committees.
I'm on the funeral guild committee at St. Luke's. I'm happy to do that. We've had a number of deaths in our family and I know from personal experience that having a place for mourners to gather after a service is a solace. It's a time of sharing food, renewing acquaintances and reminiscing about the loved one.
The funeral guild stays. Probably until it's time for my own service.
I seem to be attracted to other churchy groups that promote my own personal or spiritual development. Seem? Let's face it, I'm a real sucker for them. Our pastor started a Bible study class, I'm in a meditation group, then foolishly signed up for a six-week course in something that ended up being a rather interesting discussion group.
Discussion groups or anything even remotely resembling this kind of interaction is out.
I have a part time bookkeeping accounting job which I really enjoy. One of the reasons that job is satisfying is because I must focus. It feels good to shut everything else out. I have vague memories when shutting everything else out applied to my writing.
The job stays. Plus it gives a entirely new meaning to flexible time.
Our family is unusually close. I'm lucky to be in one where aunts, uncles, cousins, sisters, children, grandchildren keep entangled in each other's lives.
My family involvement stays.
Ah, the writing, the writing. The demands of publishing have changed so much. I don't do nearly what I could be doing for promotion. There's writing organizations and lining up talks. Then getting there. And all the emails that it takes to make things happen.
I'm more ambivalent about the business side of writing than anything else. Therefore a firm decision is on hold.
Last week I began revising a short story and polishing up a book manuscript. I just loved it.
Somehow – if I don't do myself in – the writing will always be my deepest joy.
